


Yes Homo

by Drowninginfandomgarbage



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Attempt at Humor, F/F, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, basically christine and jenna are trying to get everyone together, but everyone is literally so oblivious, but i love these chatfics, christine is the ultimate matchmaker, my first attempt at something fluffy, so i dont know if it is good or not, this is a chatfic, welp here goes chaos
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-01
Updated: 2018-02-05
Packaged: 2019-02-09 00:24:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12876240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drowninginfandomgarbage/pseuds/Drowninginfandomgarbage
Summary: Christine realizes that literally everybody is pining after each other, and tries to get them all together. Jenna is her sidekick, and the rest of them are pawns in Christine's matchmaking game.OR...A chatfic filled with fluff cause I don't know what else to do with my time. Welcome, my friends, to chaos.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just so you know...
> 
> BiBiBi: Rich  
> AlwaysHeere: Jeremy  
> WaterMellon: Michael  
> JakeyD: Jake  
> TheBestJuliet: Christine  
> GossipGirl: Jenna  
> PinkLohst: Brooke  
> OneAndOnlyValentine: Chloe
> 
> I hope y'all enjoy!

**BiBiBi added GossipGirl, AlwaysHeere, WaterMellon, TheBestJuliet, JakeyD, OneAndOnlyValentine and PinkLohst to a group chat**

 

**BiBiBi named the group “the gays™”**

 

AlwaysHeere: w hat

 

AlwaysHeere: i am offended

 

BiBiBi: why

 

AlwaysHeere: nobody here is gay except you

 

BiBiBi: one *heere

 

BiBiBi: two thats not true

 

AlwaysHeere: yes it is,, right guys?!?

 

JakeyD:

 

OneAndOnlyValentine:

 

GossipGirl:

 

PinkLohst:

 

TheBestJuliet:

 

WaterMellon: im gay as fuck

 

AlwaysHeere: W HAT

 

AlwaysHeere: WHY DIDNT I KNOW THIS

 

WaterMellon: jeremy….

 

WaterMellon: i literally have a gay pride patch on my hoodie

 

WaterMellon: you helped me get it

 

BiBiBi: ;)

 

WaterMellon: R ICH nO

 

AlwaysHeere: RICH NO

 

PinkLohst: i ship it

 

GossipGirl: same

 

JakeyD: fUCKinG sAME

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: doesnt everybody ship it

 

AlwaysHeere: but im not gay

 

TheBestJuliet: dont ruin their dreams jeremy

 

AlwaysHeere: how can you abandon me like this

 

TheBestJuliet: sorry

 

TheBestJuliet: but a greater force calls me

 

TheBestJuliet: meremy is canon

 

GossipGirl: wait

 

GossipGirl: if you follow the same logic for the last name wouldnt it be hell

 

JakeyD: meremy hell

 

BiBiBi: guys, guys

 

BiBiBi: as the original shipper of this particular ship, i have a name already

 

BiBiBi: its boyf riends

 

AlwaysHeere: wait so thats why you wrote boyf on my backpack

 

AlwaysHeere: i thought you were just

 

AlwaysHeere: actually i had no idea what you were doing

 

TheBestJuliet: tsk tsk

 

TheBestJuliet: my children are so oblivious

 

AlwaysHeere: what do you mean

 

TheBestJuliet: tsk tsk

 

TheBestJuliet: my children are so oblivious at being oblivious

 

**TheBestJuliet added BiBiBi, PinkLohst, JakeyD, GossipGirl, and OneAndOnlyValentine to a group chat**

 

**TheBestJuliet named the group chat “we need to get these oblivious boys together”**

 

BiBiBi: agreed

 

JakeyD: also agreed

 

GossipGirl: i can probably say for the rest of us that we all need to make this a reality

 

PinkLohst: yeah

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: ye

 

TheBestJuliet: we need to start out subtle

 

TheBestJuliet: somebody invite them over for a sleepover

 

JakeyD: a… sleepover

 

TheBestJuliet: what?

 

TheBestJuliet: what did i say

 

JakeyD: boys dont have sleepovers

 

BiBiBi: but we did a couple of weeks ago

 

JakeyD: tHATS…

 

JakeyD: different

 

PinkLohst: ;)

 

GossipGirl: ;)

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: ;)

 

TheBestJuliet: ;)

 

JakeyD: see rich now all the girls have ganged up on us

 

BiBiBi: its true though :( i forgot my sleeping bag so we had to share the guest bed

 

BiBiBi: no homo though

 

JakeyD: yeah no homo

 

literally everybody else: yES HOMO

 

**TheBestJuliet added PinkLohst, OneAndOnlyValentine, and GossipGirl to a group chat.**

 

**TheBestJuliet named the group chat “the girls are the only sane ones here”**

 

TheBestJuliet: we need to save these boys

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: from what

 

TheBestJuliet: from their horrible single lives

 

GossipGirl: yes i agree

 

GossipGirl: we need to get these poor boys together

 

PinkLohst: OMGGGGGG

 

TheBestJuliet: what

 

GossipGirl: what

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: OMG BROOKE YOURE A GENIUS

 

GossipGirl: but she didnt even say anything yet

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: oh i know

 

TheBestJuliet: but how

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: in my strange mysterious ways

 

GossipGirl: okay then,,

 

PinkLohst: OKAY BUT ANYWAYS

 

PinkLohst: THEYRE ALL PINING AFTER EACH OTHER

 

PinkLohst: SO WE SET UP A DOUBLE DATE

 

TheBestJuliet: A GENIUS

 

GossipGirl: A FUCKING GENIUS

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: see, whatd i tell you

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: my beautiful bae is a fucking wizard

 

_OneAndOnlyValentine deleted a message_

 

GossipGirl: w ha t w a s t h a t

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: ummmmmm,,

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: nothing?

 

**TheBestJuliet started a conversation with GossipGirl**

 

TheBestJuliet: ARE YOU

 

TheBestJuliet: FUCKING

 

TheBestJuliet: SERIOUS

 

* * *

*BONUS*

 

EVERYONE (in the world): *gasps*

 

TheBestJuliet: what

 

EVERYONE (in the world): the purest of the pure just cussed,, the world has officially ended


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WaterMellon: thanks again for inviting me!
> 
>  
> 
> AlwaysHeere: ye this is going to be fun
> 
>  
> 
> TheBestJuliet: yes
> 
>  
> 
> TheBestJuliet: yes it will
> 
>  
> 
> TheBestJuliet: >:)
> 
>  
> 
> AlwaysHeere: WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN
> 
>  
> 
> TheBestJuliet: >:)))))))))))

 

TheBestJuliet: why is everybody so oblivious to everything

 

GossipGirl: idk

 

TheBestJuliet: WAIT i have to go do something

 

**TheBestJuliet changed “we need to get these oblivious boys together” to “boyf riends support group”**

 

**TheBestJuliet changed “the girls are the only sane ones here” to “richjake support group”**

 

**TheBestJuliet made a group chat with AlwaysHeere, GossipGirl, WaterMellon, BiBiBi, and JakeyD**

 

**TheBestJuliet named this group chat “clooke support group”**

 

TheBestJuliet: my job heere is done

 

GossipGirl: so whats the plan

 

TheBestJuliet sent jpeg.gameplan17

 

GossipGirl: wHat

 

GossipGirl: when the actual fcuk did you have time to do this

 

TheBestJuliet: ummmm

 

TheBestJuliet: i sorta already had this

 

TheBestJuliet: for a very long time

 

TheBestJuliet: :)

 

GossipGirl: wait if you had one for the rest of our friends did you have one for me

 

TheBestJuliet: ANYWAYS

 

TheBestJuliet: we start with the contact names

 

**Group chat between WaterMellon, TheBestJuliet, and AlwaysHeere**

 

WaterMellon: thanks again for inviting me!

 

AlwaysHeere: ye this is going to be fun

 

TheBestJuliet: yes

 

TheBestJuliet: yes it will

 

TheBestJuliet: >:)

 

AlwaysHeere: WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

 

TheBestJuliet: >:)))))))))))

 

**(the gays™)**

 

WaterMellon: wait what happened after our last convo you all just left

 

BiBiBi: “convo”

 

WaterMellon: wut

 

WaterMellon: whats wrong with that

 

BiBiBi: nobody says that anymore unless youre from the

 

BiBiBi: idk

 

BiBiBi: 80s??

 

WaterMellon: sHit

 

WaterMellon: youve discovered my secret

 

BiBiBi: wait wut

 

WaterMellon: gotta blast

 

_ WaterMellon is now offline _

  
  
  


AlwaysHeere: wait what happened

 

BiBiBi: your boyf riend just confessed he was from the 80s

 

AlwaysHeere: hES NOT MY BOYFRIEND

 

TheBestJuliet:  ~~ oh he will be >:)))) ~~

 

AlwaysHeere: what

 

TheBestJuliet: nothing

 

AlwaysHeere: So anyways,, what are we doing at the sleepover

 

BiBiBi: hA YOuRE HAVING A SLEEPOVER

 

AlwaysHeere: you literally just confessed you had one with jake a while ago

 

BiBiBi: touche

 

TheBestJuliet: I was thinking we could go to a movie or just stay at home and watch some

 

AlwaysHeere: sounds good

 

AlwaysHeere: should me or michael bring anything

 

BiBiBi: oh i SEE

 

TheBestJuliet: just yourselves >:))))

 

TheBestJuliet: and your toiletries of course!!

 

TheBestJuliet: basically just the normal stuff you bring to a sleepover besides money

 

TheBestJuliet: ill pay for the movie tickets

 

AlwaysHeere: wait no ill pay

 

TheBestJuliet: its fine

 

AlwaysHeere: at least let me pay for michael and me

 

BiBiBi: im jealous

 

BiBiBi: michael if you guys break up im stealing your chivalrous boyf

 

_ WaterMellon is now online _

 

WaterMellon:  ~~ wait no dont hes mine ~~

 

_ WaterMellon is now offline _

 

AlwaysHeere: hes not my bOYFRIEND

 

BiBiBi: ;)

 

TheBestJuliet: ;)

 

GossipGirl: what is this

 

GossipGirl: oh ;)

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: ;)

 

PinkLohst: ;)

 

JakeyD: ;)

 

AlwaysHeere: nOT AGAIN

 

AlwaysHeere: wait i have a way to stop this

 

**AlwaysHeere added WheeresMyPants to “the gays™”**

 

AlwaysHeere: dad tell them to stop

 

WheeresMyPants:

 

WheeresMyPants: ;)

 

_ WheeresMyPants left the chat _

 

AlwaysHeere: why is everybody like this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe people actually like my work!!! I am planning to update once a week, but I have no sense of time 
> 
> management and a crap ton of homework, so it will probably be late or early or something else completely different.
> 
> Love y'all!


	3. *NOT AN UPDATE SORRY*

Hi everyone...

So I haven't updated this in a while because school takes up the remainder of my life except for whatever else I have to do. But now that its winter break, you can probably expect a new chapter within the next two weeks! Some of the reason this is taking so long is because there is going to be actual content in this chapter in addition to chat, which is challenging because I have the worst writers block right now. Anyways, happy holidays and have a great break if you're a prisoner of school like me (or if you have winter break for any other reason).

Love y'all! <3


	4. the sleepover (part one)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AlwaysHeere named the group chat between WaterMellon and TheBestJuliet “stage dorks”
> 
> Drowninginfandomgarbage: wait that’s a ship name
> 
> Drowninginfandomgarbage: and it’s straight
> 
> Drowninginfandomgarbage: delete this IMMEDIATELY
> 
> AlwaysHeere: what
> 
> AlwaysHeere: who are you
> 
> AlwaysHeere: and why are you on our group chat
> 
> Drowninginfandomgarbage left the chat
> 
> AlwaysHeere: wow okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> owo i have returned

**AlwaysHeere named the group chat between WaterMellon and TheBestJuliet “stage dorks”**

 

Drowninginfandomgarbage: wait that’s a ship name

 

Drowninginfandomgarbage: and it’s straight

 

Drowninginfandomgarbage: delete this IMMEDIATELY

 

AlwaysHeere: what

 

AlwaysHeere: who are you

 

AlwaysHeere: and why are you on our group chat

 

**Drowninginfandomgarbage left the chat**

 

AlwaysHeere: wow okay

 

AlwaysHeere: what was that

 

TheBestJuliet: that was the author and they wanted you to change the contact name because it represents a straight ship between you and me and who the hell ships that

 

AlwaysHeere: what

 

TheBestJuliet: what

 

WaterMellon: what did i just walk into

 

AlwaysHeere: idk to be honest

 

AlwaysHeere: but okay then fine ill change it..

 

AlwaysHeere: whoever you are??

 

**AlwaysHeere changed “stage dorks” to “theater nerds”**

 

AlwaysHeere: you good now?

 

WaterMellon: jere who you talking to

 

AlwaysHeere: i DONT KNOW

 

Drowninginfandomgarbage: :)

 

AlwaysHeere: sEE THERE THEY ARE

 

WaterMellon: wait who are they

 

WaterMellon: how did you get yourself on our group chat??

 

Drowninginfandomgarbage: uH..

 

Drowninginfandomgarbage: rEALITY IS AN ILLUSION THE UNIVERSE IS A HOLOGRAM BUY GOLD BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

 

**Drowninginfandomgarbage left the chat**

 

AlwaysHeere: okay then??

 

WaterMellon: so anyways,, what are we going to do for the sleepover again

 

TheBestJuliet: oh we were planning to go to a movie or something right??

 

TheBestJuliet: and then we can do normal sleepover things at my house

 

TheBestJuliet: wait who heere wants to go out to a movie

 

WaterMellon: tbh id rather just watch one from your house

 

AlwaysHeere: ye me too

 

WaterMellon: should we bring snacks

 

WaterMellon: cause i could pick up jere and we could stop by 7 11 otw

 

AlwaysHeere: that sounds good to me

 

TheBestJuliet: sure thats cool

 

TheBestJuliet: b r i n g m e s w e d i s h f i s h

 

WaterMellon: what about you p2

 

AlwaysHeere: ill find something when we get there

 

WaterMellon: kk see ya later p2 ill pick you up at 4

 

AlwaysHeere: ill be there p1

 

WaterMellon: that sound good to you chris

 

WaterMellon: chris?

 

**(Boyf riends support group)**

 

TheBestJuliet: g UYS

 

TheBestJuliet: i was talking to the boyfs and if theyre not flirting idk what is

 

OneAndOnlyValentine: what did they say??

 

TheBestJuliet sent screenshot.png

 

PinkLohst: ok thats cute

 

BiBiBi: so youre following through on your plan right

 

TheBestJuliet: yep everythings going right for now

 

JakeyD: just make sure to check up on us every once in a while

 

TheBestJuliet: will do <3

 

GossipGirl: make sure you dont seem suspicious otherwise it probably wont work

 

TheBestJuliet: yep!! that reminds me i have to go reply to their texts

 

**(theater nerds)**

 

WaterMellon: chrissss?? Where r uuuu

 

TheBestJuliet: oh im heere now sorry

 

AlwaysHeere: whered you go?

 

TheBestJuliet: i  lost my phone.. but i found it now so its good

 

TheBestJuliet: and yeah that works for me

 

TheBestJuliet: you should probably leave soon… your house is like 15 min away right?

 

WaterMellon: yeah ill leave at 3

 

WaterMellon: jere be ready by 3:05

 

WaterMellon: ill honk the horn when im there

 

AlwaysHeere: ok getting ready now

 

WaterMellon: christine ill text when im on my way

 

A shrill blare pierced the silence as Jeremy zipped up his bag.

“Coming Michael!” He yelled as loud as he could out the window. Jeremy raced down the stairs and out the front door, tripping at least twice trying to get his shoes on.

“Hey, dude, you okay?” Michael asked as Jeremy plopped down in the seat, out of breath. He looked over at Michael and grinned.

“I have a plan.”

“Wait, for what?”

“It’s a surprise. Let’s go get snacks.”

“Ok, P2, whatever you say.” Michael shook his head and started driving. Jeremy could make up the craziest things.

 

“Truth or dare?” Christine asked Jeremy with a menacing look.

“Uh… dare?” Frankly, Jeremy was too afraid to ask a truth question. Christine had humiliated people on more than one occasion asking the weirdest things.

“I dare you… to play 7 minutes in heaven with somebody in this room!”

“But that’s just you and Michael.”

“I know! Choose!”

“Um… I choose…” Jeremy had no idea. A couple of months ago, he would have given anything to do this with Christine, but that was before the Play, before their friendship, before the breakup. Now it would probably just be awkward if they spent 7 minutes alone in a room. So that would just leave… Michael. He could just talk with him for seven minutes, right? The time would fly by, they would get out, and they’d pretend it never happened.

“... I choose Michael.”

“Wh- really?! Why… I mean, that’s fine with me.” He shrugged after regaining his composure. Christine showed them to a closet across the room, then remembered that she had to do something in order for her plan to work.

“Hey guys! I forgot to tell you, I’ll need your phones. So you won’t try to like, call somebody, or anything.” She mentally cursed herself for coming up with such a stupid excuse. Jeremy and Michael looked at each other in confusion, but still took their phones out of their pockets to give to her. She grinned, and then pushed them in and locked the door.

“CHRIS!” Jeremy yelled, banging on the door.

“I’ll set the timer, don’t worry!” she called back, unlocking both of their phones and preparing to set her plan in action.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there!!!!! First things first:
> 
> I'm so sorry this post took so long! Homework and life and binge watching shows have got in my way and I didn't have any time to do anything until now. Second: OH MY GOD. Over 100 kudos?! I still can't believe people read what I write, but thank you so much?! I hope you like my extremely late chapter, and I hope to update again in the next week or so, but I can't make any promises. But let's hope I actually get inspiration this time, because I am not planning on abandoning this fic.
> 
> Love y'all!

**Author's Note:**

> If you guys like it, I might continue...
> 
> Please comment what you think!
> 
> Love y'all!


End file.
